What a strange week.
10.) It has come to this: Local Fox news anchors took to wearing yellow neckties to promote the Simpson's 20th anniversary special. Can you imagine being in the marketing meeting touting this ridiculous concept?
9.) Word has it that Tiger Woods is donating money toward Haiti earthquake relief. I don't care if it's $3 or $300 million, this comes off as hollow ploy to rehabilitate Eldrick as corporate good guy. More proof that this stooge has learned nothing from his public flogging.
8.) Brittle Mets centerfielder Carlos Beltran elects to have off-season surgery. No biggie, right? Only Carlos not only doesn't use the team surgeon he neglects to tell Mets brass. Is it only me or does anyone else think that NBC executives are now also running the Mets?
7.) A rising tide lifts all boats. The Great Late Night Fiasco of 2010 has made everyone with a monlogue and couch relevant and funny. CBS' Letterman has never been wittier or more vindicated. O'Brien, Leno, Dave and Kimmel are daily must-watches.
6.) Among the most chilling information to emerge from the Haiti coverage: Scientists peg the chances of a Category 7 earthquake hitting southern Caifornia in the next 30 years at 99.7%. Yet, strangely, everyone is concerned with this being Simon Cowell's last season on Idol.
5.) Al Roker describing the lodging conditions on NBC's Today show--including showing viewers where "Anne Curry slept last night." Who cares about Anne Curry or where she sleeps. There are people dying in the streets in Haiti yet Roker hijacks airtime to tell us about sleeping arrangements. He should be FIRED for this...Unreal.
4.) Based on public comments, I get the feeling if people knew, or could separate, the character Jerry Seinfeld from the real-life Jerry Seinfeld, his popularity might suffer. His comment about NBC's handling of Leno/Conan was ill-timed. "What did the network do to Conan," Seinfeld says. "{When the ratings suffer} "It's on you." Don't look for Seinfeld at the O'Brien family picnic. When Michael Richards issued his "I'm not a racist" mea culpa on Lettermana few years back, Jerry shamed the crowd, who laughing nervously, didn't know if it was a gag. "It's not funny," said Seinfeld.
3.) After some mergers & acquisitions, Triple AAA ain't the same friendly, do-gooding organization you remember. That's all I'll say.
2.) Lock-it up: Feb. 7, in a rematch of Super Bowl III, is Cowboys-Colts.
1.) One year later, the Miracle on the Hudson is more remarkable in every sense of the word. And thankfully, pilot Sully has, pardon the pun, remained grounded. Maybe heroes can exist.
Friday, January 15, 2010
Thursday, January 14, 2010
Last Night's Comments On The Great Late Night Fiasco (1-13-10)
It's getting ugly. How much time passes before NBC – which is getting clobbered -- says enough is enough. Here are last night’s zingers….
Tonight, ABCs Jimmy Kimmel, who did his entire show the other night in a bad Leno chin and wig, guests on Leno at 10. Should be fun (and slightly awkward.)
The Tonight Show with Conan O'Brien
Hi, I’m Conan O’Brien, and I’ve been practicing the phrase, “Who ordered the mochaccino grande?”
Hosting “The Tonight Show” has been the fulfillment of a lifelong dream for me – and I just want to say to the kids out there watching: You can do anything you want in life. Unless Jay Leno wants to do it too.
According to a new TV Guide poll, 83 percent of voters want me to stay at 11:35. When he heard this poll number, President Obama asked, “How can I get NBC to screw me over?”
I’m getting a lot of support out there, especially from an online group calling themselves “Team Conan.” It’s very exciting—it’s the first time in my life I’ve been on a team where I wasn’t picked last.
Last night, the new season of “American Idol” started on the FOX Network and it was watched by an audience of 30 million people. When they heard that, NBC executives said “That’s not true, there’s no such thing as an audience of 30 million people.”
The Jay Leno Show
Good news from Afghanistan -- critics of the war have stopped referring to it as "another Vietnam." they are not calling it that anymore. The bad news -- they're now calling it "another nbc."
Welcome to nbc. America's most dysfunctional tv family. Thank you very much.
You thought the Gosselins were screwed up. Oh my god.
Nobody knows what is going on. Conan O’Brien, understandable, is very upset. He had a statement in the paper yesterday. Conan said nbc has only gave him seven months to make his show work. When i heard that…seven months! How did he get that deal? We only got four! Who’s his agent? Get me that guy. I’ll take seven.
All the late night host are having great fun with this debacle. Last night Jimmy Kimmel did his show dressed up as me. Show that clip. I was going to come out dressed as Jimmy Kimmel…put jimmy’s picture up there. But I realized I do not have enough black shoe polish here at NBC to get my hair that dark.
Late Show with David Letterman
“Okay, all right settle down, CBS hasn’t fired me yet.”
“Cold outside, isn’t it lousy cold outside today? Whoo! You know, they say, from the weather bureau, they say it’s caused by an arctic chill between Jay and Conan.”
“Did you hear about this? Yesterday, Conan O’Brien – it’s so, so confusing, ladies and gentlemen. And Jay Leno used to be on at 11:30, then they moved him to 10, then Conan O’Brien was on at 11:30, now they want him to go on at 12:05 and then they want to put Jay from 10 to 11:30, and Carson Daly now’s got to get a show in Mexico or something. He don’t know what to do…It’ll make you dizzy. So Conan O’Brien says yesterday, ‘Well, I’m not doing the ‘Tonight Show’ at 12:05,’ and you think about it, well, he’s right. ‘The Tonight Show,’ that would, you know, that’s the next day. It’s not really – it’s like ‘The Day After’ or, what it used to be, ‘The Tomorrow Show. So he said, ‘Forget it, I’m not doing the show at 12:05. Well, NBC went back to him, and they decided to sweeten the deal – they offered him 12:04.”
“And now, the buzz is that Conan may leave NBC to start a show of his own at another network, and I thought, ‘Where’d he get an idea like that?’”
“And the whole idea of this was NBC wanted to get a thing going whereby they wouldn’t make the same mistake they made when Johnny quit and retired, that there were a lot of bad feelings. They wanted to avoid causing more bad feelings – well, mission accomplished.”
“I miss Johnny Carson – I mean, by God, when Johhny quit, he quit.”
“And my mom, bless her heart, she’s so confused – last night, she actually watched me.”
“Oh, now this was good: last night on ABC, Jimmy Kimmel did the entire show as Jay Leno…Jimmy Kimmel was so convincing as Leno, today, NBC canceled him.”
Tonight, ABCs Jimmy Kimmel, who did his entire show the other night in a bad Leno chin and wig, guests on Leno at 10. Should be fun (and slightly awkward.)
The Tonight Show with Conan O'Brien
Hi, I’m Conan O’Brien, and I’ve been practicing the phrase, “Who ordered the mochaccino grande?”
Hosting “The Tonight Show” has been the fulfillment of a lifelong dream for me – and I just want to say to the kids out there watching: You can do anything you want in life. Unless Jay Leno wants to do it too.
According to a new TV Guide poll, 83 percent of voters want me to stay at 11:35. When he heard this poll number, President Obama asked, “How can I get NBC to screw me over?”
I’m getting a lot of support out there, especially from an online group calling themselves “Team Conan.” It’s very exciting—it’s the first time in my life I’ve been on a team where I wasn’t picked last.
Last night, the new season of “American Idol” started on the FOX Network and it was watched by an audience of 30 million people. When they heard that, NBC executives said “That’s not true, there’s no such thing as an audience of 30 million people.”
The Jay Leno Show
Good news from Afghanistan -- critics of the war have stopped referring to it as "another Vietnam." they are not calling it that anymore. The bad news -- they're now calling it "another nbc."
Welcome to nbc. America's most dysfunctional tv family. Thank you very much.
You thought the Gosselins were screwed up. Oh my god.
Nobody knows what is going on. Conan O’Brien, understandable, is very upset. He had a statement in the paper yesterday. Conan said nbc has only gave him seven months to make his show work. When i heard that…seven months! How did he get that deal? We only got four! Who’s his agent? Get me that guy. I’ll take seven.
All the late night host are having great fun with this debacle. Last night Jimmy Kimmel did his show dressed up as me. Show that clip. I was going to come out dressed as Jimmy Kimmel…put jimmy’s picture up there. But I realized I do not have enough black shoe polish here at NBC to get my hair that dark.
Late Show with David Letterman
“Okay, all right settle down, CBS hasn’t fired me yet.”
“Cold outside, isn’t it lousy cold outside today? Whoo! You know, they say, from the weather bureau, they say it’s caused by an arctic chill between Jay and Conan.”
“Did you hear about this? Yesterday, Conan O’Brien – it’s so, so confusing, ladies and gentlemen. And Jay Leno used to be on at 11:30, then they moved him to 10, then Conan O’Brien was on at 11:30, now they want him to go on at 12:05 and then they want to put Jay from 10 to 11:30, and Carson Daly now’s got to get a show in Mexico or something. He don’t know what to do…It’ll make you dizzy. So Conan O’Brien says yesterday, ‘Well, I’m not doing the ‘Tonight Show’ at 12:05,’ and you think about it, well, he’s right. ‘The Tonight Show,’ that would, you know, that’s the next day. It’s not really – it’s like ‘The Day After’ or, what it used to be, ‘The Tomorrow Show. So he said, ‘Forget it, I’m not doing the show at 12:05. Well, NBC went back to him, and they decided to sweeten the deal – they offered him 12:04.”
“And now, the buzz is that Conan may leave NBC to start a show of his own at another network, and I thought, ‘Where’d he get an idea like that?’”
“And the whole idea of this was NBC wanted to get a thing going whereby they wouldn’t make the same mistake they made when Johnny quit and retired, that there were a lot of bad feelings. They wanted to avoid causing more bad feelings – well, mission accomplished.”
“I miss Johnny Carson – I mean, by God, when Johhny quit, he quit.”
“And my mom, bless her heart, she’s so confused – last night, she actually watched me.”
“Oh, now this was good: last night on ABC, Jimmy Kimmel did the entire show as Jay Leno…Jimmy Kimmel was so convincing as Leno, today, NBC canceled him.”
Tuesday, January 12, 2010
O'Brien Says No To 12:05
Conan O'Brien says he will not do "The Tonight Show" if it airs at 12:05 a.m. He released the following statement Tuesday afternoon:
People of Earth:
In the last few days, I've been getting a lot of sympathy calls, and I want to start by making it clear that no one should waste a second feeling sorry for me. For 17 years, I've been getting paid to do what I love most and, in a world with real problems, I've been absurdly lucky. That said, I've been suddenly put in a very public predicament and my bosses are demanding an immediate decision.
Six years ago, I signed a contract with NBC to take over The Tonight Show in June of 2009. Like a lot of us, I grew up watching Johnny Carson every night and the chance to one day sit in that chair has meant everything to me. I worked long and hard to get that opportunity, passed up far more lucrative offers, and since 2004 I have spent literally hundreds of hours thinking of ways to extend the franchise long into the future. It was my mistaken belief that, like my predecessor, I would have the benefit of some time and, just as important, some degree of ratings support from the prime-time schedule. Building a lasting audience at 11:30 is impossible without both.
But sadly, we were never given that chance. After only seven months, with my Tonight Show in its infancy, NBC has decided to react to their terrible difficulties in prime-time by making a change in their long-established late night schedule.
Last Thursday, NBC executives told me they intended to move the Tonight Show to 12:05 to accommodate the Jay Leno Show at 11:35. For 60 years the Tonight Show has aired immediately following the late local news. I sincerely believe that delaying the Tonight Show into the next day to accommodate another comedy program will seriously damage what I consider to be the greatest franchise in the history of broadcasting. The Tonight Show at 12:05 simply isn't the Tonight Show. Also, if I accept this move I will be knocking the Late Night show, which I inherited from David Letterman and passed on to Jimmy Fallon, out of its long-held time slot. That would hurt the other NBC franchise that I love, and it would be unfair to Jimmy.
So it has come to this: I cannot express in words how much I enjoy hosting this program and what an enormous personal disappointment it is for me to consider losing it. My staff and I have worked unbelievably hard and we are very proud of our contribution to the legacy of The Tonight Show. But I cannot participate in what I honestly believe is its destruction. Some people will make the argument that with DVRs and the Internet a time slot doesn't matter. But with the Tonight Show, I believe nothing could matter more.
There has been speculation about my going to another network but, to set the record straight, I currently have no other offer and honestly have no idea what happens next. My hope is that NBC and I can resolve this quickly so that my staff, crew, and I can do a show we can be proud of, for a company that values our work.
Have a great day and, for the record, I am truly sorry about my hair; it's always been that way.
Yours,
Conan
People of Earth:
In the last few days, I've been getting a lot of sympathy calls, and I want to start by making it clear that no one should waste a second feeling sorry for me. For 17 years, I've been getting paid to do what I love most and, in a world with real problems, I've been absurdly lucky. That said, I've been suddenly put in a very public predicament and my bosses are demanding an immediate decision.
Six years ago, I signed a contract with NBC to take over The Tonight Show in June of 2009. Like a lot of us, I grew up watching Johnny Carson every night and the chance to one day sit in that chair has meant everything to me. I worked long and hard to get that opportunity, passed up far more lucrative offers, and since 2004 I have spent literally hundreds of hours thinking of ways to extend the franchise long into the future. It was my mistaken belief that, like my predecessor, I would have the benefit of some time and, just as important, some degree of ratings support from the prime-time schedule. Building a lasting audience at 11:30 is impossible without both.
But sadly, we were never given that chance. After only seven months, with my Tonight Show in its infancy, NBC has decided to react to their terrible difficulties in prime-time by making a change in their long-established late night schedule.
Last Thursday, NBC executives told me they intended to move the Tonight Show to 12:05 to accommodate the Jay Leno Show at 11:35. For 60 years the Tonight Show has aired immediately following the late local news. I sincerely believe that delaying the Tonight Show into the next day to accommodate another comedy program will seriously damage what I consider to be the greatest franchise in the history of broadcasting. The Tonight Show at 12:05 simply isn't the Tonight Show. Also, if I accept this move I will be knocking the Late Night show, which I inherited from David Letterman and passed on to Jimmy Fallon, out of its long-held time slot. That would hurt the other NBC franchise that I love, and it would be unfair to Jimmy.
So it has come to this: I cannot express in words how much I enjoy hosting this program and what an enormous personal disappointment it is for me to consider losing it. My staff and I have worked unbelievably hard and we are very proud of our contribution to the legacy of The Tonight Show. But I cannot participate in what I honestly believe is its destruction. Some people will make the argument that with DVRs and the Internet a time slot doesn't matter. But with the Tonight Show, I believe nothing could matter more.
There has been speculation about my going to another network but, to set the record straight, I currently have no other offer and honestly have no idea what happens next. My hope is that NBC and I can resolve this quickly so that my staff, crew, and I can do a show we can be proud of, for a company that values our work.
Have a great day and, for the record, I am truly sorry about my hair; it's always been that way.
Yours,
Conan
Conan and Dave Jump On Leno
Following yesterday's announcement that NBC had cancelled the Jay Leno Show at 10:00 --and moving him back into his old late night slot--the gloves came off. On last night's Tonight Show with Conan O'Brien and Late Show with David Letterman, large portions of the opening monologue were devoted to the news. Typically, you wouldn't hear so much inside baseball about networks and programming on these shows--that's why it was so great to hear the airing of network dirty laundry--at Leno's expense.
In a perfect world, NBC would love to re-install Jay Leno back into his old 11:35 slot and move the start of the Tonight Show back one half hour to 12:05. Good for Jay, bad for Conan. Late Night With Jimmy Fallon would also move back on the schedule.
Conan O'Brien greeted his audience with this quip: "Settle down, everyone. If you keep this up, you won't hear a joke until 12:05." O'Brien, whom everyone predicts will jump to his own show on FOX, was good at portraying the jilted lover. In a skit, O'Brien wondered if NBC will keep him, "If he adds 10 pounds of chin."
David Letterman, who hates Leno, also got into the act. Letterman, playing the role of "the enemy of my enemy is my friend," also devoted chunks of his opening monologue to the debacle over at NBC. Reacting to NBC's lineup changes, Letterman quipped: "Don't worry about Jay, he'll land on his chin." Dave even made his old employer the subject of last night's Top Ten, "Top 10 Signs Of Trouble At NBC"
Is it only me or does this Jay Leno/Conan O'Brien thing strike you as an episode of 30 Rock being played out in real life? Only Tina Fey's fictional executives seem smarter.
In a perfect world, NBC would love to re-install Jay Leno back into his old 11:35 slot and move the start of the Tonight Show back one half hour to 12:05. Good for Jay, bad for Conan. Late Night With Jimmy Fallon would also move back on the schedule.
Conan O'Brien greeted his audience with this quip: "Settle down, everyone. If you keep this up, you won't hear a joke until 12:05." O'Brien, whom everyone predicts will jump to his own show on FOX, was good at portraying the jilted lover. In a skit, O'Brien wondered if NBC will keep him, "If he adds 10 pounds of chin."
David Letterman, who hates Leno, also got into the act. Letterman, playing the role of "the enemy of my enemy is my friend," also devoted chunks of his opening monologue to the debacle over at NBC. Reacting to NBC's lineup changes, Letterman quipped: "Don't worry about Jay, he'll land on his chin." Dave even made his old employer the subject of last night's Top Ten, "Top 10 Signs Of Trouble At NBC"
Is it only me or does this Jay Leno/Conan O'Brien thing strike you as an episode of 30 Rock being played out in real life? Only Tina Fey's fictional executives seem smarter.
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